The boat drops me and a half dozen other pilgrims off at the bottom of a very steep cliff right under the peak of Mt. Athos. I shoulder my little pack and in the sunny 35 degree centigrade heat plow my way up the crevasse to the right which has been paved with a good path broad enough for pack mules to walk up with supplies like oil or the occasional older monk or overweight pilgrim. After a half hour of uphill sweating like a faucet I reach the main monastary, a lightly fortified chapel and small refactory on a precipice overlooking the startling blue sea water streching to infinity below. There is confusion, some Greek pilgrims are having a drink in the shade. I squeeze in next to them on one of the benches and a silent monk brings me a tray with lokum (Turkish delight), raki, and a glass of water. Slowly the other pilgrims from my boat straggle in, sit alongside and pour thier raki into their cups of water, making it momentarily cloudy and silvery before they sip it chatting in a pauseless stream of Greek syllables.

I corner one of the monks and try to describe accross our language barrier what I seek. It is here that the inner transformation system of Orthodox Christianity is introduced to me by name: "Hesychasm."

Hesychasm is the concept and the adherent of this concept is a "Hesychast."

Hesychasm!

It appears that is the 14th century some holy fathers living as monks within Orthodoxy (I assume on Mt. Athos) moved together to revive something inside Orthodoxy they felt had become weak or lost: spiritual rebirth and the higher spiritual struggle. I was later told that they at first were considered a heresy by the Church and then, as sucessful heresies do, it became an integral part of the Church`s theology. The hunt for the inner oral teachings of Christ on self transformation, or Heschasm, is on.

Father Athanasios decribes the basic science of inner development taught by Jesus:

"There are three barriers of growth towards God:
1. Bad things inherited from childhood
2. Egoism/ the desire from worldly pleasures
3.The Devil
Only when the first and second are almost annhiliated will number three appear to a person. The devil does not appear to those taken with the world. There is no reason for him to show himself to a person, no risk for the devil that the person will become close to God.

When the Devil has been defeated God enters into the supplicant`s body.
- It is they that pray on behalf of the world
- There are a few of these men on Athos but the identity is hidden: holy men
- There are many Orthodox christians out in the world living normal secular lives that are also on the path to a closer relationship with God. These lay christian seekers have a teacher on Mt. Athos and receive instruction and encouragement from that person. One monk said ``without a teacher a man alone cannot get closer to God.""

I leave Aghias Annas with the following leads:
- Brother Macarius at Simonas Petras Monastary speaks great English and has information about Hesychasm.
- The monastary of the Holy Archangels founded by an Orthodox monk from Athos who moved his mission
to the US (named Elder Ephraim) is reachable at Fax number 210.833.2793
- There is an excellent magazine published 35 Miles north of San Francisco in the US called ``Devine Ascent`` PO Box 563, Point Reyes Station, CA 94956
- Monastary in Serbia at Novi Pazar Town in Ribaritz (outskirts) called Monaster Tserna Reka where Father Nicoli speaks English. He in turn will know about other monastaries in the Balkans with strong spirit.

The Place of Aghias Annis, described
- Several buildings sprawled accross the steep cliff face, chief among which is the main chapel which houses the relics and is the site of the two-hour-long services held four times each day.

There is a building called the Kimiterio which:
- Holds the cranium of all the monks passed away
- All the other bones are held in the same room in bins by type.
- Each skull is beautifully carved with ist name and life dates written in calligraphy on it`s forhead.
- Each body is buried in loose earth outside the Kimiterio for three years until the bones are clean.

Aghias Annas (which means `Saint Anne`) is the largest and oldest of all the Skiti on Mt. Athos. The foot of Saint Anne encased in a silver reliquary is kept here (Saint Anne is the mother of Mary). At Aghias Annis there is also the shrine of two converts to Christianity under the period of Ottoman rule who were killed for their beleifs. There is also the cave home of the dearly departed monk who only slept in his chair.

I met among the pilgrims a very wonderful Armenian-Ukranian pilgrim from Odessa who`s faith in prayer, fasting, and meditation for the elimanation of all physical illnesses was very strong. He had a deep beleif in the Orthodox path and said that the Ukraine is the home of great passion for God and Kiev hold the tombs of 2000 saints. He also mentioned places of great devotion in Russia named Valam, Solouki, Svir, Siya, Obnora and White Lake. His name is Sarkisian Arsen, and he lives at Lavochnaya Str. N.33, Slobodka District, Odessa, Ukraine, tel. 380-48-2-34-17-11. He said that he had before been a great rake but had later found his faith again to regain balance. He emphasised the beauty of the people and architecture of the Ukraine and invited me to visit him in Odessa.

The Story of another American Pilgrim who converted to Orthodox Christianity

- I was told by several people on Athos about another American on a spiritual quest who had participated much more deeply in each of the world`s great traditions (he learned sanskrit, old chinese, old hebrew, aramaic and old russion so he could read the great holy books and wisdoms from the original materials)
- He eventually concluded through his study that the best for him was Orthodoxy, he converted becoming
baptized as an Orthodox Christian and changing his name to Seraphim Rose.
- He founded the St. Herman of Alaska brotherhood and wrote many books about finding God and theology.

Much of my private time on Athos was spent in the company of the English language translation of some work of one of the Holy Fathers of Athos. Here are some quotes from the Holy Fathers:

``The aesetic struggles create spiritual suffering which allows the aspirant to resist the pull of earthly attractions`` - Wisdom From Mt. Athos, Sophrony. This is the culture of the heart, prayer from the heart, not from the head.

``Many have made a study of all the faiths, but the true faith they have not come to know as they should`` From the works of Staretz Silouan (who lived from 1866 to 1938)

``I cannot forget him (God) for a single moment, and my sould languishes for him`` Adam`s Lament, Staretz Silouan

``O Lord, bestow thy Holy Spirit on thy servants, that their hearts may be kindled by thy love and their feet set upon the right path of truth and goodness`` Staretz Silouan

``Monks strive to receive the Holy Spirit through humility, obedience, love, compassion, unceasing prayer. Six months, ten years, maybe fourty years afterwards they knowgrace but few retain it, then they pine and burn to regain the state of grace.`` -From the works of Staretz Silouan

``All those that would follow our Lord Jesus Christ are engaged in spiritual warfare. The Saints by long expereince learned from the grace of the Holy Spirit how to wage this war.`` `` From the works of Staretz Silouan

``A man will say ``I have faith in the commandment of love towards God.`` When irrelevant thoughts intrude into the mind the mind at that moment becomes not only concerned with God but also with them, so the commandment to love God with all their mind and all their heart is not fulfilled. Train yourself to cut off an intrusive thought immediately and if you are forgetful and fail to chase them away at once bring God your repentance. Be at pains over this so that youaquire the habit.`´ `` From the works of Staretz Silouan